Wednesday, July 06, 2011

When I was Broken [One-shot]



well this is my first one-shot.



What to say to someone whom u love the most.......that is ur parents.....u cant go against them.....while u can't just live like this anymore......u cant go against them and do what u want most in this world.....u cant fight with ur parents at least......the parents who gave u birth.....the parents who have done everything for u.......


Well this is the story of my life.........Nupur Bhushan........and this is my life.......i am a kid.....who is pampered but less than my sister dia.....after all she is beautiful and I am not....and this story is closely associated with me......how???? Well it's because.....my life deals with phases which broke me.......




Every time when I want to come out of the pain.......it increases........and oozes out of my eyes.....in form of tiny droplets......but what can I do????? I am helpless.....i can do anything for my parents.....well.....i love them so dearly.....

Any person who meets me thinks that I am "reserved" type........but I am not.....only my best friend Gunjan knows the real "Nupur"........Nupur who is so soft.......Nupur who wants to grab this world......Nupur who wants to live her life....Nupur who is as fresh as a dew drop on a flower....Nupur who can do anything she wishes in front of anyone...Nupur who never hurts anyone......Nupur who can do anything to make u happy......Nupur who is so emotional that on seeing a movie too......she can shed tears....tears for the imaginary loss......Nupur who loves her family the most.....and can sacrifice everything for them.....Nupur who is free.......who breathes free.....who is a kid...the real Nupur.

But this world can only see the fake Nupur.......Nupur who remains quiet......Nupur who never breaks a rule.......Nupur who never lets anyone say anything about her.....Nupur who has restricted herself from everything she likes........Nupur who is stubborn.......who is a kid with anger.......who is aggressive.......who wants everything from her life.....who even fights with her parents......who just is rude with everyone.......who is mature enough to know what is right and what is wrong......the fake Nupur........



Gunjan always tells me that when she saw me first and had a talk with me........she realized that I have imprisoned the real "Nupur" inside me......she asks me to bring that Nupur out.....she asks me to let the real Nupur breathe or else it would die of suffocation.....she tells me that she has seen the real me.....and she says that its very delicate....i should bring her out.....why do I keep her intact?????

Well that's how my life is.....





How can I bring myself out? I know that this world isn't a place for emotional fools like me.....how can I bring her out when I know that she will be crushed to death.....at least by not coming out....she is safe....while I knew that if I brought her open......people will say something.....which I cant hear.......and I know that probably I am afraid of them......




Well today I am broken......

I am right now sitting in the cafeteria of my college........its late.......college had dispersed....but I am here to console myself.....rather find a place too shed my tears......but I knew that I needed a shoulder to cry my pain out....i need someone in my life on whose shoulder I can cry when I am broken.....but there was no one like this in my life....well but I can atleast cry my heart out......i can cy in peace......especially when my dream is shattered.......



"why god why? Why do u give me pain which I can't tolerate.....today my dream too shattered....why? I never asked for anything......then why doesn't I get what I want??? I was so happy yesterday......but today it turned out to be a nightmare...."

and she broke down into sobs.......



I heard someone's footsteps coming near me......i just wiped off my tears....nupur Bhushan never cries in front of anyone....she isn't weak.....but who is the one coming towards me so late??? I thought that I was alone in the cafeteria......but someone is there......who's he?

I saw him from a distance.......



Is chocolate brown eyes......his hands running through his hairs in an adorable way......his biceps so strong that it convinces u that whenever u r going to fall, these two strong arms would hold u.....his tall macho type of physique.......oh my gosh!!!!! He was mayank.......mayank sharma was coming towards me...

Did I tell u that he looked extremely handsome in red shirt and black jeans??? He looks hot....but I wasn't going to notice him today......today I wanted to pour my heart out....
But not in front of him.....how can i????

He came towards me.....he took a seat besides me and sat down....his eyes asking a million questions....



"kya hua?" he asked....

"kuch nahi." I said without facing him......

I cannot tell a lie facing someone.....i just couldn't.....

"Nupur......jhooth mat bolo.....batao kya baat hai? Aur mujhse kuch chupane ki zaroorat nahi hai." He said....

I looked at him......his eyes......his deep brown chocolaty eyes......could make u drown forever....i wanted to look at them till eternity.....they looked very soothing.....extremely soothing....they seemed to drink out pain from my inner self......




I don't know what I was thinking right two minutes back....i just know that tears welled up my eyes.....and I don't know how I reacted.....i just know that right now I am in his arms........arms which were caressing my back.....arms soothing me......arms in which I always wanted to rest....since forever.......

I broke off the hug.......but I knew that I didn't wanted to......i wanted to rest in his arms till eternity......and he too seemed not to mind.........





"Nupur ab batao ki kya baat hai." He said as we sat down on the chair......

"kuch nahi mayank.....aisi koi bhi baat nahi hai jo ki reasonable ho." I said knowing that I was not wrong......it was just a small matter on which my heart broke.....

but his eyes were constantly soothing my pain......i felt so secure in his arms.....i felt so loved in his eyes.....but I knew that this was a mere imagination.....i knew that its because I love him.....that I am imagining that he loves me too......





"reasonable ho ya na ho......tum mujhe bata rahi ho.....cause tum mujhse kabhi bhi kuch nahi chupa sakti ho....u have no right to do that......tumhe pata hai ki main kitna dar gaya tha.....aaj subah se dekh raha hoon ki tum kaafi upset si ho.....aaj tumne hamesha ki tarah apne pen ko cap nahi kiya after use.....u never forget to do this.....aaj tumne apna lunch bhi nahi liya.....besides aaj tumne woh apni ungli ko apne hoton par nahi debaya......aur I know ki kuch to hai jo tumhe pareshaan kar raha hai.....tell me about it......" he said......

I never knew that he noticed this much about me.....

Infact I never knew that he ever noticed me......gosh! he had noticed my tiniest things I do when I am sad....how could he know me that deeply???




tumhe kaise pata chala mayank? Mujhe nahi pata tha ki u notice me." I said...

"I notice u????? u r the one jispar mera concentration shayad padhai se bhi zyada hota hai....tum bahut important ho meri life mein.....so just tell me.......main kab se tumhe dhoondh raha tha.....aur I knew that tum yahin par hogi." Mayank said.

I felt too glad.......i wanted to hear this from his mouth since eternity.......i loved him.....and atleast I had some place in his life......and today he was saying this cause I was broken.....





"mayank woh actually aaj main ek singing competition ke liye tyaar huyi thi.....i got selected in the auditions.....i got the middle place even! And I love to sing songs.....my dream is to become a singer." I said.......

"I know.......i have heard ur songs on net......they r wonderful.....but tum to doctor banana chahti ho na?" mayank said......

I felt so happy.......he had heard my voice on net.......i never knew that he knows my name even.......i am feeling happiness engulfing my pain.......



"woh actually my dream is to become a singer only......lekin apne parents ke liye doctor banana chahti hoon." I replied........

I had never told anyone this......this was a secret which no one knew.......god knows why but I poured out my heart to him........

"oh.......tumne apne sapne ko kisi aur ke liye badal diya???? To hua kya?" he asked.....

"woh actually......meri mummy ne mujhe mana kar diya hai singing ke liye...us mummy ne jinki khushiyon ke liye I sacrificed my dream....i hid the real me.....and she stopped me from the opportunity I was getting.....but what can u say to her??? I love her tooo much to rebel....why does it always happen to me??? Whenever I feel like having getting close to my dream....it shatters.....someone always pulls me back.....i don't know that...." I felt tears strolling down my cheeks.......



he was also numb......there was an awkward silence filling the room......

but then he said something which I wasn't expecting.........

"Nupur, I know how it feels........and today I want to tell u a truth......I LOVE U...." he said.

He didn't know that I was waiting for him to say this since long......i loved him too....he confessed.......he confessed that he loves me too.......

"I LOVE U TOO mayank..." I told him happily.......




then he came closer to me and rubbed off all my tears.....and then shortened the distance between our lips and kissed me......

he kissed me deeply........and I knew that this was not to show passion.......or to show anything.....but to tell me that he is there with me......he wanted to tell me that whatever be the case......he is there with me......this kiss showed on trust on each other.....and our need for support.........his kiss assured me that he would be there to support me....and will always be a shoulder to cry upon....whenever I will be broken......

when I was broken.....he sowed me the new ray of hope......he gave m the spirit.....the spirit to live....

and I knew that if I would fall then he would be there to hold me.....till eternity........








hope it didnt bored u.......
hope it was tolerable
do comment
cause it means a lot to me......
plzzzzzz
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- Mahak

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