Thursday, August 04, 2011

I love you...just another three words...??

I love you…just another three words…??

Sitting on my swing, I thought about the messages that he sent on my mobile.

I love you…

Those three words seemed so improper. So false. Never in my life, had I expected him to say those words to me. How can someone be so casual with such valuable words? For me, ‘I love you’ is a sentence that means life-time commitment. I have always dreamt of hearing those words from the one person I marry. Yeah, I am in love with the concept of arrange marriages.

But still, I am shocked how people can use these words on anyone they have a crush on? I mean, really? Is love just a fling? Either people’s definition of love has changed, or I am very orthodox. But seriously, I believe that, I would say these words to only one person in my life. Not anyone I seem to find handsome. Really. The use of these three words like this makes me sick.

This is really, utterly disgusting. How can someone use these words with so much carelessness? As if these are not something important, but something that can be used like trash. I really hate this mentality.

I strongly believe that love happens only once. Not twice or thrice. If it does, then it’s not love but lust. Besides, I am a little emotional when it comes to words like this. ‘I love you’ for me, is a very strong emotion. You just can’t feel it for every other person. You have to feel it and mean it, to be able to understand the depth of it.

I think I am starting to hate these words, especially from the mouths of people I despise. Being me, it’s really hard to despise anyone. So, I would settle with dislike. I have suddenly started despising these three words coz he said those to me.

How could he? Did he forget that I was there when he said those words to my ex-friend? I don’t hate him, it’s just that…I can’t seem to like him at all. How can someone be so casual with something like this? This is really pathetic.

His one message has shaken my whole view of love. Before this sudden message, I had forgotten that I had met him. I had forgotten those incidents, how we used to be friends, as his girlfriend was my good friend. But then, she and I had a huge fight which disrupted everything. And I couldn’t blame him when he took her side. 

But I hated when he angrily stared at me. He loathed me. I could see that in his eyes. And I am a great reader of eyes. So, what had changed? I didn’t even blame him for anything he did. In-fact, I had forgiven him and forgotten everything. In short, I had moved on from that dirty phase in my life. I had to face so much during that phase. I was humiliated, tortured, and emotionally broken. Yeah, I am sensitive like that. 

And after so many months, I had forgotten those incidents. Atleast, I tried to. And the last thing I heard was that she broke up with him. So, why was he messaging me? I mean, really? Me? The girl who hated these things?

What hurt was the thing that he had the nerve to message me and say those words to me. ‘I love you, I really do’. How can someone treat these words like a joke? For me, ‘I love you’ is rather…sacred.

And he had said those words to my ex-friend with so much passion. Even I was convinced of his love for her. I felt shy when I saw them talking. When she used to be my friend, she used to share so much about him. She used to say that he was really sweet and loving and that he loved her very much. So, what had gotten wrong?

When I first got a message from an unknown number, I asked back about the number. When I got his name in return, I was shocked out of my wits. I felt anger, but then I composed myself and asked ‘why are you messaging me, after everything that happened?’, but his answer was even more shocking. He replied, ‘coz I realized that I made a mistake’. When I asked which mistake, he said, ‘I fell in love with ya.’ 

I told him that I knew that he loved her, to which he replied that ‘No, I was talking about you. I love you. I only liked her.’ I was really shocked. Did those times, when he said he loved her, were only like? Did he actually use those terms as waste? And at that moment, I started hating him.

I told him to shut up and never message me ever again. How could I trust him when he had the nerve to use those words for me as if nothing had happened? When he hadn’t meant those words for the first time he said them, what makes him think that I would believe that he means it when he says that to me? What if, he does that again? Besides, I am a one-man girl, and I am never going to believe the likes of him.

I hate people like these, who say these words and mean nothing. There may be people to whom it doesn’t matters, but to me, it does. A lot. It means the world to me. Like I said, these aren’t just another three words for me. I was heavily upset with the use of these words like this, so I told my friend everything. My friend consoled me and asked me not to cry for him coz she knows that I am really sensitive. But, I am never going to cry for him or due to him. Why should I? He means nothing to me!

It’s just that I can’t believe his audacity to say those words to me, knowing that he means nothing to them. But I guess I can’t only blame him. Today, people use these sacred words like this only. I can only hope that my future husband doesn’t do so and that he loves me truly, not only for the name sake.

But seriously, is ‘I love you’, just another three words, having no value whatsoever?

-        -  Mahi

NOTE: All the characters in this above story is completely fictional. Although, I have completely kept myself at her place and written this story, the incident that happened, is purely imaginary. 

For God sake, like always, don't think that this happened with me. These are my own views, and are not written to offend anyone. Do forgive me if I have unintentionally offended anyone. 

Well, hardly any reader of mine comes to my blog...they rather comment on my I-F account, but yeah, I am late...literally...so I can't publish it on I-F right now. Would do it later :)

Please leave a comment to tell me about your views :) And yeah, I always DO check the comments and reply back :)

Aapki,
Mahi 

20 comments:

  1. Hey Mahak...

    True feelings!!.. Every girl wants some one who says these three magical words truly deep from the heart and not artificially... I got this SMS that says "I'm not waiting for a prince, I'm waiting for the one who treats me like a PRINCESS.." How true naa?? Every girl loves being pampered with tokens of love and these three magical words. Most of the films show a still silence after the confession of these three words just to emphasize the importance of these words...! Unfortunately, there are people who don't respect these words..

    Well... N as SRK said in KKHH "Hum ek baar jeete hai, ek baar marte hai, PYAAR bhi ek baar hota hai aur shaadi bhi ek hi baar".. But, nowadays there are many who have forgotten the concept of TRUE LOVE...SACCHHA PYAAR..!

    A good POV Mahak..! Definitely a thoughtful and a meaningful one..! Loved the way you showed the emotions of this girl..! Because her emotions are the emotions of every girl who thinks like her on this matter...

    POOJA

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  2. @Pooja- WOW. I truly enjoyed reading your comment...this one was really unexpected.

    And true...the message was amazing. Even I don't want a prince charming...i want someone who treats me like a princess. *shy*

    Yeah!!! EXACTLY! The silence in the movies show how about important these words are...but then, people today don't take it seriously.

    Wow Pooja....i must say..i am loving the way you added quotes...they are just like hammer on the fire.

    Thank you *bows*

    Yeah...even mine. Like I said, this story is not is not on me...but the reaction is completely me.

    Thanks yaar...for taking out your time and commenting itne ache se...tu toh janti hai ki how much i love comments ;)

    P.S. - Iski vajah se i am gonna concentrate on 'Arrange Marriage' novel.

    - Mahak :)

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  3. You Know Mahak, I believe in letting the love 'Cook' :D

    The mystery in the whole thing is what i like! If I have feelings for someone, I wont tell it to them straight away. I would observe it and let it convey itself silently. If it can bear that much patience...it is True Love <3

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  4. @Harsh Sir- Ooohhh...so you are the type of guy who would not confess his feelings and silently love someone? Wow..that's so cool..!!

    Honestly, when I used to watch daily-soaps, i used to be like 'Kitne pagal hai dono...chup chaap apne pyaar ko chupaaye jaa rahe hain. Keh kyun nahi dete ek doosre se ki pyaar hai. Saara zanjhat khatam ho.'

    But then, I started writing bigger things...and moved on...so, i realized how wrong I was. I mean, now when i watch the shows, i love the silent love more than the verbal one. Coz it makes me feel real...and not artificial.

    So, I honestly agree with you. You have nice thoughts regarding it. Lekin phir bhi, agar kisi se pyaar karo, toh use bata do...kahin der na ho jaaye.

    And yeah, aajkal ke logon ke casual use of these sacred words ko dekhkar lagta hai ki naa kaho toh hi acha hai :)

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  5. Mahak... hehehe der na ho jaye ka hi sabse zyada dar rehta hai... :D

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  6. @Harsh sir- Wahi toh..isiliye i don't prefer silent love..kahin der ho gai toh?

    Like i wrote many oneshots on one sided silent love...like 'besides me', 'Just a fling', 'those facebook quizzes', etc etc..

    And when i wrote them, i kept myself at their place. And i was literally afraid ki kahin der na ho jaaye..i felt the fear and the anticipation...and yet...the strong feeling of love.

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  7. @ Mahak...yaar lekin bohot jaldi bolna bhi theek nai hota...kya fayda you repent later..or make a wrong move in the approach :)

    Will surely read all of them one by one...

    Keeping yourself in the place of charaters brings the intensity in the story !

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  8. @Harsh Sir- Yeah...i agree...early confession results in a direct refusal. Yeh toh pakka hota hai :)

    Hmm....thanks for that....Mere saare readers I-F par hain..hardly anyone comes here.so it feels amazing to have some comments here also LOL Warna toh yeh blog aise hi collection ke liye tha...

    Yeah...i agree..and that makes it harder for to write. I always keep myself at the character's place. And hence, it hinders my writing. coz i feel what they feel..and i become so involved that i forget what is reality and what is fiction. :)

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  9. hmm isiliye i like it when they move from friendship to love :)

    I am more comfortable to comment here and thank god you are OK with that:D

    Yes we become too involved and sometimes it is even embarrassing to present it before others :D right?

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  10. @Harsh Sir- Yeah..Me too...i LOVE those stories where frdship blooms into love..it's amazing.

    Why shudn't I be uncomfortable in that? I mean, mera blog hai..aap kisi padosi ke blog par thodi na comment kar rahe hain ;) And i am more than just Ok with that.

    Right...there are some pieces in my diary and pc which i haven't dared share with someone. :D

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  11. @ Mahak..haan tumhare padosi ke blog pe mai kyu comment karun...and glad to know that you are more than happy with that :D

    see i told you na ! happens many times...

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  12. @Harsh Sir- Wahi toh...jab aap mere hi blog par comment kar rahe hain, then why humein kya problem hogi? Ulta hum toh bahut khush hain.

    Yeah, you are right. It happens a lot of times...

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  13. @ Mahak...pleased to make U happy :)

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  14. @Harsh Sir- Ab main phir reply karoongi...aadat hai meri... :):):)

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  15. @ Mahak- to karo na, apna hi blog samjho :D

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  16. @Harsh Sir - Hehehehe. :D I would, as long as you do. Akhiri comment mera hi hoga, I tell you.

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  17. Firstly that opening line is just beautiful in its simplicity and significance. The time old tradition of dissecting discussions and yet with that twist of new.

    True words carry no weight these days. We have not only reduced the sentiment but also its name to luv. Actually luv seems more appropriate for what is contained within people's hearts. However it is unfortunate that people do not seek love, with all their heart for it is possible to achieve, we must first believe.

    I loved the flow to hate. It seemed so natural and so rather than use it to contrast love, you give it a character all of its own, finely done, for most would have use the more common route of contrast.

    Ah! then those excuses for the lack of impropriety with love. Excellently written, adding woe upon woe.

    We are all trapped by our definitions of love, some find it vast so that they may never find the borders and yet others it is so narrow, so that they are not even able to turn around whilst turning their hearts over and over that even I get vertigo.

    Nicely penned, as always, with much love, Sabah

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  18. @Sabah – God…you don’t know how happy I am to see your review on my blog. Seriously, this has to be my lucky day. You do know that, you are most wonderful reader, right? And the most accurate and critical one at that?

    You know I love simplicity more than anything else. So I preferred starting it with something I like. Actually, this idea developed in my mind, when I was actually sitting on a swing, so I used it as a quote.

    Yup, I would prefer silently liking someone, than saying the words I never meant. Like I said, I am only going to use these words, once in my lifetime. Once once.

    I totally agree with you. Glad you liked the flow to hate. Thank you. And here you go, making my blush.

    Again, thanks a lot. I am glad that you founds it excellently written. Even I love how to dissect the piece and give honest reviews.

    My definition of love is, that it is a feeling after marriage. I agree with you completely.

    Thank you Sabah, for leaving such a great review.

    With much love, Mahak

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